To start with, boredom isn’t bad. There’s countless studies which show that it’s almost a form of mental hygiene, like brushing your teeth! When we’re bored, our brain is often operating unconsciously, which allows us to relax, decrease our stress and critically our mind resolves thoughts and challenges sort of as a background process.

We all understand this and have experienced it. Like when you have “shower thoughts”, how you often come up with solutions or remember things as soon as you jump into the shower. This is because your brain is in a state of ease.

Similarly, boredom prompts us to get creative, to explore and challenge ourselves and seek stimulation and experience. But we need to teach young people how to read those emotions, and of course what to do when they feel them.

Boredom isn’t bad, and it isn’t something kids need to be saved from. At Risky Kids we’ve learned that most of the time, “I’m Bored” means “I need help”. It’s something kids say when they’ve disengaged from something.

What’s important is understanding the reasons they’ve disengaged. Was it too hard? Too easy? Something unexpected or even upsetting? Kids will disengage for a variety of reasons, and these are the moments for us to help them, not to helicopter in.

If you let a young person be bored, whether it’s at home or participating in a hobby, you’ll often find that they’ll begin to problem solve. They’ll start to get creative, to try and figure out ways to solve their boredom.

That doesn’t mean we can’t be involved either. Our team will engage with young people, asking them some key questions:

• “Why do you think you’re bored?”
• “What can you do to challenge yourself more?”
• “How can you get help if this is too hard?”

By asking these questions, we not only help a young person understand their boredom and feelings, but also teach them strategies to manage their emotions and act on them for the better.

On the other hand though, if every time a young person says that they’re bored we leap in, assume that there’s something wrong with what they’re doing or that it’s somehow not “for them”, we walk a fine line of overparenting, and reducing resilience and growth.

You don’t need to “solve” boredom, and if your kid is bored it doesn’t mean you’ve done anything wrong. Don’t let anyone (including yourself!) pressure you to be an entertainer for your Risky Kid.

There are times when it’s right to change our approach, to mix it up or move on. But often “boredom” can be healthy, and even more often it can mean something deeper. We can use these opportunities to help a young person grow and understand themselves better.

Managing the “I’m bored” moments right takes practice, but it’s well worth it! By helping young people navigate these situations we can build deep resilience, and a lifelong autonomy and sense of self-responsibility.

We can teach them to improve their Help Seeking behaviour by encouraging them to speak to their teachers, leaders or coaches. We can increase their emotional self awareness by challenging “why” they’re bored. We can develop creativity by allowing them to remain bored and learn to entertain themselves or solve their own boredom.

The only sure fire way for boredom to decrease resilience, is if we try to “solve” it every time it appears. This isn’t helpful for them, and it also creates a great burden on caregivers and educators to perpetually entertain young people.

Boredom is part of life! And it’s not a bad one either. It helps our minds to declutter itself, to be creative and also creates opportunities for us to grow.

As parents and educators, we should see these as moments to better understand our young people, not to “save” them.